What is it About Sleep?

After sleep training both kids, I seriously thought our sleep issues were over. After all, we taught them how to comfort themselves and built a night time routine that we still honor today. They were each dream sleepers for nearly three years after, logging 11-12 hours a night with very few wakings.

But that's the thing about parenting.

It likes to kick you in the butt.

The past year has been very challenging in the sleep department. Both kids wake multiple times each night due to fear of the dark, fear of noises, fear of being alone, needing to cuddle, needing to cuddle and needing to cuddle. Did I mention they need to cuddle?

Many nights I'd wake up at about 4 a.m. to discover both kids wedged in between us, arms and legs woven in and out of covers and around us. The worst part was they'd likely been there for hours and neither of us had any idea how they crawled in. Sleep deprivation will do that to you.

Can I get an Amen please?

So we tried some trusty approaches. We used sticker charts and rewards. We followed the routine more strictly. We posted sleep rules. We reminded them of the rules before every night. We put a baby gate in our doorway. We praised the rare successes.

I wish I could say it worked.

Part of the problem is, I really do understand where they're coming from. Our kids REALLY need snuggling. Physical touch is the greatest means through which Natalie and Gavin feel loved. They're always snuggling, cuddling, wrestling, hand holding, hugging, piggy back riding, etc. So it only makes sense that when they are the most tired, lonely and in need of comfort that they would head straight toward mom and dad's bed.

But dang, I just can't sleep with that many people in there.

Our latest solution is a strange reward system that, thankfully, has been giving us all some quality sleep the past two months. The kids must sleep three nights all the way through in their own beds before earning a parent to sleep the next night in their bed. (Note: They each have a double bed and we only join them at our bedtime, not theirs.) They love the idea of having a roommate so much, they've been sleeping angels. From our perspective, we're getting three solid nights of quality sleep and then grabbing another night of fairly good sleep (one kid and one parent in a double bed is actually kind of snuggly).

It's not ideal, but I've long since given up on ideal.

I'll take adequate.

And another eight hours of uninterrupted sleep.